


Killing Me Slowly

by taeluna



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Short One Shot, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:35:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23250082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taeluna/pseuds/taeluna
Summary: In which Taeyong soon leaves for a tour first ever in your relationship and neither of you know how to cope with it.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Reader
Kudos: 7





	Killing Me Slowly

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bognooki](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bognooki/gifts).



> Hi everyone! This is my first work ever and I am really excited to share it with you! I was in a big Taeyong missing mood and needed some fluff stuff to calm myself down so this is the end result. I hope you will like it! Sorry for my mistakes, english is not my first language! Also I would like to gift this work to my greatest help, my partner in crime @bognooki! Thank you so much for helping to me and always cheering me! 🤧💚

"Are you coming?" 

Your boyfriend's voice suddenly dragged you back from your thoughts. You grabbed your towel and pajamas and followed him to the bathroom. 

You were dating for almost a year now with Taeyong and you usually loved spending time with him, like doing just normal and simple things together because no matter what you always enjoyed each other's company. 

These days however were different. It's not that you hated being around him now. No. The exact opposite to be honest. You wanted to spend as much time with him as you could but there was one big problem… and every time you looked at him you remembered it right away. 

And it slowly began to destroy you from the inside. 

You knew that it wasn't just you… because he felt the same way as well. It's just that none of you knew how to deal with this. The topic itself has come up many times since you found out but you two always ended up in fighting over it so neither of you came up with it for a while now. 

It was the worst idea and you both knew it but you didn't want to get into another fight. Still, you wanted to find a solution to this so bad. 

There was total silence in the bathroom while you both undressed. You didn't even look at him but you felt his gaze on you. He felt the same tension as you did. 

You wanted to make it easier, for the both of you. You wanted to be strong for him and just tell him that everything's going to be alright but you can't. The only thing you were sure of that you don't want to lose him.

He opened the shower. It was warm and comfortable. You suddenly became determined to make some kind of conversation to relieve the heavy tension between you. You forced a smile and turned around to face him for the first time since you were in the bathroom. 

"Do you remember the cactus you gave me not too long ago? Well, it bloomed and it's just as beautiful as you said."

You knew he loved plants, especially the ones he had back at his dorm room. To be honest you always thought it was cute how he took care of them and one day when he saw you looking at them with a smile he immediately wanted to buy you one too. 

You were against it first and said they would probably won't survive your treatment in the first place but then he showed you one of his cactus which only had a few buds at the time. He told you how little you need to take care of it and it will still bloom beautiful flowers. He was right. 

"Oh really?" 

You felt his relief. He slowly started to smile. 

"See, I told you. It will bring a little joy to you with every flower."

You loved his beautiful smile. He only smiled like this when he was with you and you often thought he must be a true angel because only angels could possess a sweet smile like this. 

But right now it almost ripped your heart out of your chest. 

You smiled back at him and quickly turned around. You felt your eyes were burning and the least you wanted him seeing you cry. He probably thought that you wanted him to wash your back because he began to slowly spread the shower gel on it. 

You were surprised but relieved at the same time and you waited for the shower to slowly wash your teardrops away. 

You both stayed silent for the rest of the shower. When you finished you began to dry yourself and get dressed as soon as possible. You felt your heart full again with pain and you didn't want it to explode right here. You finally finished and you hurried to the door. 

"Y/N… wait!"

He grabbed one of your hands lightly, stopping you from escaping. 

"I know what is going on. I saw you crying in the shower… and it honestly broke my heart… So please, talk to me!" 

You heard the pain in his words. Your eyes were swelling again. 

"Noo… haha… what are you talking about? I'm fine. Really. So don't worry."

You still haven't turned around and now you were too scared to do so. 

"Please…" 

You suddenly turned around because you weren't sure about it first but you were right. You saw the small teardrops slowly falling out of his eyes and this was the last string for you. You hated to see him cry and now you hated yourself too. You quickly wrapped your arms around him and let your tears fall as well. 

"I'm so sorry… It's my fault… I… I just should have been more stronger for you… for us… But I failed… and now I hurt the both of us…" 

Your tears were still falling like rain when you felt him hug you back and hold you closer to him. 

"I'm just as guilty in it…" 

He slowly began to talk. 

"I shouldn't have let it be forgotten in the first place just because we got into a fight a couple of times…"

You both collapsed onto the bathroom floor. He buried his face in your shoulder and you started to stroke his hair gently while you were still fighting with your tears to stop. 

"I just… I know I' m being selfish… but it's so hard to imagine you to be away from me for almost a half year… I mean I knew it was going to happen sooner or later… but right now I'm scared… That's right… I am really scared…" 

This was the first moment when you finally admitted it to yourself this too and it just made it all even worse. You felt him slowly lift his head from your shoulder which was now completely soaked because of your boyfriend's tears. 

"It's so scary, right?" 

He tried to force a smile but you still saw the sharp pain in it. 

"But I decided that I won't let this stand between us… I  
I know it will be hard… I know it will be, but we will get through it I promise… I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to say these words to you before… but I can't stand to see you fall apart anymore… so please… forgive me… "

He cupped your face with two hands and you raised your hands to hold his. His tears were still falling but he managed to smile through it and you don't know why it comforted you and made you smile too. 

"I… I will forgive you if you forgive me first."

He chuckled. 

"No, you first!" 

He pouted and you began to laugh. You felt the heavy stones sitting on your heart for weeks now slowly started to roll off from your heart. The only thing you felt now was your love for him. 

"Oh god… Look at us! We are both crying on the bathroom floor and can't decide who should forgive the other first…" 

You both laughed and both of your tears slowly began to stop. 

"Yeah… we are being ridiculous…" 

He sniffed while he giggled and pulled you in a close hug. Your head was resting on his chest and you stayed like this for a while and the only thing you heard was your hearts beating together. Then his voice broke the silence in the room. 

"You know… I never trusted that there would ever be someone I could love. Someone who would accept me as I am and love me for myself, although my parents always encouraged me though… I think I was always a weird kid…" 

He stopped for a minute. You raised your gaze to meet his eyes. 

"The point is… I just wanted to say… Thank you. For loving me and always being there for me. I am really grateful every single day."

You quickly kissed him before your tears could roll out again and you knew there was no need to say it because you both knew it. You love each other and nothing else matters.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope it was worth your times! Feel free to leave comments and suggestions! Thank you so much for reading it! Have a nice day! 💞


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